Wednesday, January 21, 2009

High velocity air blowing through narrow gap handy dryer -omac

I went to a swanky bar for a drink with my fellow stuffed toy friend friend. We moaned about our lack of control over our lives, inevitably, the conversation eventually became a tad depressing. Oh, but then a trip to the toilet and things became interesting...

They had a hand dryer. They had a British model. It was one of those Dyson AIRBLADE things. Oh I'm sure they have them everywhere in London toilets, probably even on the walls in bars, in post offices.... but I've never seen one of these. I thought my paws were going to be sliced off.

So yes, apparently the "Dyson Airblade™ blows a high velocity blade of clean air through an aperture the width of an eyelash to wipe hands hygienically dry in just 10 seconds" according to the website.

I was pondering about how they came up with that name, Airblade ™. It's sounds quite fierce.
"So ya, what we gonna call this baby?"
"High velocity handomatic? Cold air dryer?"
"NO NO NO! We need something fierce, something slick and classy. Now how small is the space that the air blows through?"
"Uh oh oh, the width of an eyelash!"
"Exactly! The width of an eyelash or.....the width of a blade of about it, it's blowing AIR through a gap that is the width of a BLADE of grass....."
"Oh right so maybe Air Grass...."
"No you cretin! It's strong, a stream of AIR like the BLADE of a sword..."
"Oh oh! Air Sword!"
"No! That will scare people. We shall name it...AIRBLADE TM!"

*Everyone cheers, he cracks open a bottle of champagne, drinks from the bottle and kisses his PA. All the staff members climb onto the table, "Everybody Dance now" by C+C music factory mysteriously starts playing. The minute taker gives up as people are stepping all over his notepad that he was just doodling on anyway and he joins the fray. The PA slinks off to the toilet to cry and be sick.*

Everybody Dance Now
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