Thursday, January 15, 2009

Kitten and the Torrent(s)

As a stuffed toy, I sometime find life rather dull, because it's difficult to live a life not based at all on Free Will. I often spend many hours in a Chinese apartment. Anyway, as a way to remedy this I began downloading TV programme popular with the youth of today. I one day stumbled up this little gem. It's symbolises many of the key things that are wrong in the world of Human beings. It's America's Next Top Model, with Tyra Banks. The basic format of the show is a reality TV show. There are 12 girls who hope to one day be top models. They do crazy photo shoots, get extreme makeovers (one of the girls always looks terrible and cries), get hung off the side of buildings, made to pose underwater in a dirty fish tank, broken down, get taught how to smile with their eyes etc. One is eliminated each week. It's hosted by Tyra Banks.

The first photo shoot is always 'hardcore'. They get them to model abstract concepts that I imagine are very difficult to convey in a photoshoot, like Abortion or Humanitarian Aid. In this series they had to portray cancer victims....
...I'm sorry....what?! The photo shoot was to show the effects of smoking, oh right, that's not disturbing or sick or very wrong. They were their made up to look like they'd had chemotherapy. Umm...?!!!! Most of the girls in this cycle smoked anyway, so stood around at the photo shoots painted white, wearing bald caps with bits of fluffy hair stuck to it, smoking a cigarette. I swore quite a bit at the TV.

Then a few episodes later, it was the makeover episode and Tyra decided to shave a girl's head. Just shaved it off because her hair was f*cked. Tyra said so, then she smiled.

The girl was close to breaking point.

The girls get their personalities picked apart. If they're not smiling, happy and commercial they're pulled apart by the judging panel (mere scrapings of humanity, devoid of any sense of moral being) until they cry and show 'they are human' then they get eliminated the next week for being over emotional.

It's horrible.

I totally want to see Roland Rat taking Tyra's spot in the next series.

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